Veritas

Veritas means "truth". It is so easy to believe and look at deception as if it wasn't even there. Even leaving parts out of a story is deception. Lately I have joined a fire department, got a full time job, attend school, advanced another level in my field, and so on and so forth. Great accomplishments right? I can easily sit here and say, "I'm good, here is all I do." Or people praise you and tell someone the "good stuff". They seem happy for you. But you think to yourself, "oh, how easily you do not know about what is really going on." Do we settle for this? Are we afraid of the truth, to look and examine ourselves, point it out to others gracefully? Sure, we're human and we will and do mess up whether we like it or not. But this new person, this woman, who has become negative, and hard to get along with, argumentative, stubborn and maybe more judgmental? No. Not who I really am. So many things influence us. Especially people. Have met people who have brought me down, rubbed off on me characteristics that are not me, and I have taken part in things I usually wouldn't. After a while you loose sight. Can't really see and tell, since we ourselves are the ones involved. Since we claim we're decent, we ignore any advice and truth that comes our way; truth that is on track, on base, correct and supported. Even have drifted away from my faith. But do I want to settle? I am so longing for people to see the real me. To meet new people, have new friends, be a positive influence, loving towards others when it comes to faith. To work hard in every area. Be helpful without being reluctant. Not to groan and complain, be selfish or comparing, or to look for satisfaction in the wrong places. I feel like I cannot even fully describe what has been going on except that life gives you lessons and tests, learning them is hard. I am excited to regain and be myself! Also to start blogging again. All I know is that life is better to be positive, forgiving, and a friend to anyone. Enjoy my life, I have one! All that stuff I typed in previous paragraphs is just not who I am! I can't even desire to be that way anymore! I am an adult and have to make good decisions, learn how to be dependable, trustworthy, reliable, not all for me, for others. For God. Because honestly, I care about others more.